Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Traffic, Rants, & Expletives

This must be a SaturdayOk, today is my day to vent (you know before I move towards my whole healthy zen lifestyle free of expletives). So anyway, I commute about 2 hours/day (total) - pretty much standard in DC. But this shit REALLY gets on my nerves on the daily:

1. People with no EZ-Pass/Smart Tag for the toll road (WTF)!!!! It feels exactly like those visa check card commercials when things are zooming and ish but then someone stops the WHOLE show to find cash to pay the toll – B*TCH go in the damn cash lane! This really gets on my last damn nerve….it’s 2007 folks. Let me upgrade you.

2. People going the 55 mph in the damn fast lane (on the rare occassion we're moving at regular speed). If you drive slow, and you see cars passed you consistently, move your ass over to the right…DAMN.

3. People who ride the exit/entrance lanes to get ahead of traffic but just cause more traffic. Unless it’s me, then it’s ok – shit I have places to be.

4. People rubbernecking when they see an accident on the side of the road. This has been known to delay my commute at least an hour for an accident that’s just on the SIDE of the road. Get a damn life.

5. People who have to come to a complete stop to make a right onto a side road. I mean seriously, there’s no light, no stop sign, is your car really that f*cked up that you can’t make a damn right turn without stopping? Where did you get your driver’s license?

6. Stop and go….bumper to bumper traffic….hate it. Wasting my damn gas.

7. People who brake for no reason, CONSTANTLY, learn how to drive in slow traffic without slamming on your breaks every 2 seconds. Especially when you’re a huge truck and I can’t see in front of you….

I know I’ve left some off, but maybe you can share the shit stuff that gets on your nerves. Possibly it’s folks like me driving like a maniac cursing you out trying to make your non-EZ-Pass-having-assbehind get over to the right lane. I’d like to apologize, DC has turned me into a psychopath. I need help. Now, back to centering myself..


Dirty Red said...

What pisses me off is when you are in a major traffic jam one minute and all of a sudden it clears up. What the hell caused it? No wrecks, no rubbernecking, nothing. Just a bunch of dumb-ass drivers.
Also I hate oriental drivers. (THIS IS NOT A RACIAL THING) Are they not the worst drivers on the damn road?

brightstarr said...

LOL, I have to agree with you on both points's not racial at all. Asians ARE really the worst drivers! Btw, if I must say so myself, black women have the worst road rage...we are mean as HELL!